Wednesday, September 19, 2012

And the figuarive "other shoe" inevitably drops...


So after last week's amazing weight shedding feats, I started to get worried that the pace was unsustainable and "this was all happening too soon!"   Where were all the set backs?  And the hard knocks?  And the upward fluctuations I was supposed to learn from?!  It was too quick; I hadn't suffered enough yet!!!

Well. 

Consider that all ancient history. Allow me to present The Foot-In-Mouth Progress Tracker:

 
 
Just look at it!! You can practically HEAR the record-skipping sound effect that should inevitably accompany this garbage dump of a graphically represented situation!!!
 
All that stuff I said about wanting to take it slow and have a lifestyle change and not slip into the yo-yo dieting mindset.....I take it all back!   I want instant results and I wanna look hot, damnit!  Diet gods, you are hereby on notice: I am no longer going to cockily beg you to just "Take it down a notch."  I'll take ANYTHING you've got!
 
Alright, now that is out of my system, let's analyze what we have here.  We appear to have a chart showing a current weight of 156.2....it's been that way for two days now, or technically three.   On Monday, I got really excited to see a low point of 155.6, but before I could snap a photo, the number disappeared and when I jumped back on the scale to recapture the magic, the number bounced up to 156.2.   This means one of several things: 1) My body has single handedly disproven Newton's Law of Universal Gravitation, 2) The Universe is "Out to Get Me," or 3) I have a crappy scale.   Gonna put my money on the crappy scale.    As much as I love My Fitness Pal, it won't let me edit the weights that I have inputted, so the low point of 155.6 remains even though I don't actually believe that was accurate.
 
Anyway. I am going to keep doing what I'm doing; I've been great about my diets and I've even braved the 20 flights of stairs at work once!   If nothing changes by Thursday, I'll reevaluate. 
 
But for now, I'll just enjoy a big ole slice of Humble Pie and think twice about ever questioning the diet gods' ways again.