I already feel like I spend almost all of my free time working out and blogging and all of my pocket money on workout-related stuff (gear, gym membership, etc.).
This blog and the lifestyle change accompanying it feels incredibly all-consuming at times.....and I experienced a powerful reminder of that at about 6:30 this morning when Relapse Into Chunky Town took me.......to Walmart.
| Evil corporation to be avoided at almost all costs. |
And not just any Walmart. Specifically, the Walmart made notorious by this epic video.....
I went. To Wally World.
(Oh go ahead and watch it again, you know you want to).
And for my out of town readers who don't recognize the location: no, I am not kidding. This video was filmed right here in NOLA and I would have paid more money than I care to admit to see it being filmed live. Miley Cyrus, move over. You've just been out-twerked.
Alright, back to the topic at hand.
So I woke up this morning, and I had a good feeling about today's weigh-in. After the birthday calorie-fest, my weight crept up to 147.0 and I have been really diligent about going to the gym and watching my calories to undue the birthday damage and try to get down to 145.0 by Saturday's wedding. I just had a feeling in my gut that today was going to be a good day on the scale.
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| Feelin' good. |
Until I stepped on Lady Justice (that's the scale's name) and a big, blank screen starred back at me.
I tried a couple more times. Surely this was a mistake.
Any second now.....
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| Seriously... |
And finally after multiple attempts I resigned myself to the fact that Lady Justice's batteries were completely dead.
Cue panic mode.No.
There was no way that I was going to live my life, go about my day, and carry on as normal without knowing whether my gut feeling about today's weigh-in was correct.
So I grabbed the car keys and cowboy boots and--still in pajamas--headed out the door for the nearest place that sells lithium batteries at 6:30 in the morning. That place, evidently, is Wally World.
I loathe Wally World. Loathe it. But I was desperate and everything else nearby was still closed.
I arrived and the parking lot was surprisingly full considering the hour. I parked in the first open spot I could find and raced in and scanned the fluorescent horizon for anything resembling the "battery section."
I found an employee and asked her where I might find batteries. "Over there" she said without looking up from her magazine as she vaguely pointed in the direction of the children's clothing section.
Right.
I was on my own. So off I searched.
The search didn't take long. It turns out that lots of people must need batteries at a moment's notice because they had a battery station right next to aisle 65.
Success!
I found the batteries I needed and was ready to get the heck outta there.
There was 1 line open (this was, after all, before 7 AM).
I cautiously approached the single illuminated light in the entire check out area and was completely relieved to see that there was no line! Not a soul ahead of me. Just another employee hanging out by the open lane talking to the cashier. Score.
So as I walk up, batteries and cash in hand, ready to make my teeny, tiny, single-item purchase, the employee that was hanging out by the cashier sees me approaching and literally runs off to snag the first random item she can, puts it down inches in front of my batteries on the conveyor belt, and cuts in front of me.
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| Uh. Okay. |
So I am immediately thinking, "Well, that was kind of rude," because this employee completely cut in front of me. But then I figured, "Oh, whatever. It's just one thing. She might be about to start her shift and wanted to buy a snack before a line forms."
So I patiently wait my turn.
It's just one item after all.
Or so I thought.
It actually turned out to be one item + cash back. And evidently the cash back created a very real problem. And I will never know what the issue was, but fast forward twenty minutes, 4 paycheck cards, 2 gift cards, a store manager, and a lane-switch later (they finally opened a second one about 15 minutes into this process)....I finally was able to buy the goddamn batteries.
This is why I don't do Wally World.
But it was so totally worth it:
Just half a pound to go by Saturday. I got this!!
