Thursday, September 20, 2012

Defying Gravity. And Thermodynamics. And Reason.

Well, it's official.  I am an enigma.  An exception to the rules. A super special snowflake.  My body defies gravity. And thermodynamics. And reason.

My Inner-Elphaba says: F*(&$ YOU, Gravity!!


Day 4 at 156.2 pounds.  What the hell?!

I thought that after three solid days with no scale-ular movement (and, I might add, with completely steadfast adherence to my diet plan), I was surely going to see SOMETHING good today.  Whether it be a pleasantly-surprising 1 pounder or even just a "hey, I'll take it" 0.2 pounder, I thought that this HAS to be the day that 156.2 becomes ancient history.

No such luck.

How is this even possible?  Seriously.  I have experienced fluctuations. I've experienced stagnation. But over half a week with no movement at all?!?  AT ALL!? 

I've been racking my brain trying to figure out the cause, but there's NO REASON.   Sodium intake?  Stable.  Alcohol intake? Stable.   So this can't be water-retention-trickery....

I became convinced that the scale was broken. Either its fancy gravity mechanism wasn't properly registering my weight or maybe the screen was broken and its pixels were stuck in a permanent 156.2 formation.  I moved the scale around the room to try it on different surfaces. I even purposely put it on sections of the floor that I know are unlevel after Hurricane Isaac.  Still 156.2.

I even woke up the husband at 6:00 AM and insisted that he try out the scale.   I was convinced--CONVINCED--that he was also going to weight 156.2.  He initially refused to cooperate. He said I was being unreasonable.  Instead of taking no for an answer, I begged and started making an irritating high-pitched "Eeeeeeeeeeeeee!" sound.  To get me to stop whining he begrudgingly weighed himself.  When the scale registered him at good 20 pounds heavier than me, I was satisfied that the scale was functioning properly, but disappointed that the problem appears to be with me....not with the hardware.

Ugh.   This is so frustrating. 

My rational side keeps saying, "Hang in there!! You're still way ahead of your target because last week was so good!  You'll have a nice big drop soon enough, I know it!"

But unfortuntately, until something breaks this 156.2 streak, my body will continue to defy gravity. And thermodynamics. And reason.